This Love, This Hate
by FlyAndDontLookBack
Summary: One last recording before they graduate. One last recording before they all separate. One last recording before they completely forget the friendship they once had. One last recording... Before he leaves forever. song: This Love, This Hate. singer: Hollywood Undead. implied suicide. angst. one-shot


**So, I am here with another story, and let me just say, this one came out completely out of the blue.**

**Well, that's a lie. I've actually had this idea in mind for a couple of days but I was too busy helping out a friend write a story (which will be uploaded here, in my account) and continuing the A: TLA fanfic. Unfortunately, the avatar one is going to be on hold because I had no idea it would be this hard to write the idea i had planned out.**

**One of my weaknesses is apparently having the conclusion and intro but not the body (which completely sucks in my opinion)**

**Anyways, after helping the friend out with the story, I was writing the Avatar one but realized that I didn't have enough motivation for it. So I decided to put that one on hold for the time being. I will eventually write and you guys can read it if you want, but it will be delayed. You have been warned.**

**Moving on, this one is angsty, as seen in the genre section. I wouldn't say it's as angsty as my AoKaga (My Savior, My Angel) one but it implies suicide and just general depression. I believe that this is worthy to be called angst.**

**I fell in love with this song while listening to the Hollywood Undead playlist and while listening to it many times, I couldn't help but think of Kuroko and how dark the days were for him when he was rejected in Teiko. So, naturally, I needed to write something about it.**

* * *

_**DISCLAIMER**_

**1\. This song that is to mentioned below is called _This Love, This Hate _by_ Hollywood Undead_ (my most favorite band of all time). ****By no means am I stealing it or stating that it's mine when clearly, I can't write such meaningful lyrics. ****I'll put the song link in my profile so check it out if you want**

**2\. Also, _Kuroko no Basuke_ is definitely not mine whatsoever. Blame Fujimaki; he's the one who started it all**

**3\. I'm pretty sure that most of you won't really read the lyrics that I put there but it really is meaningful and scarily relevant to what Kuroko might have been feeling at that time. Some of the lyrics will be underlined. The only thing I ask is that you read at least those parts :)**

**4\. This song is mostly rap, but remember when you read that when Kuroko was singing only one verse (you're probably not going to understand this until you actually read lol) he was singing it in a lullaby kind of way. When he sings the full song (again, you'll understand this better when you actually read) he sings it with a rap but still in like that lullaby kind of way.**

**That's it and I hope you enjoy with one-shot!**

* * *

The first time they heard the song, they were smiling brightly, their bones being rejuvenated as his voice carried happiness and love, a sign that they would be together forever.

"Is that the whole song?" One would ask if they heard it for the first time or were just simply curious, and the one who sung would shake his head, a small smile etched onto his face.

"It most likely isn't." He would answer, "But that is the only verse I know. And I like that verse very much. It reminds me of us." Those around him, with their vibrant hair colors and their even more vibrant smiles, would gather around him and hug him after he was done explaining, glad to have him around.

* * *

_liar. you did know the whole song._

* * *

"Where did you learn to sing like that, Tetsu?" One asked after the members had been tortured with the captain's new regimen, and the one who sung the lyrics titled his head in thought before shrugging.

"I've no clue." He answered and the taller of the two laughed.

"Then, where did you learn that song?" He proceeded to ask and the smaller one shrugged once more.

"It has been with me for some time now."

"Mind singing it again? For everyone?" He then asked, and those who were listening to their conversation suddenly put on hopeful faces. The smaller boy couldn't possibly say no.

"A small verse wouldn't be bad." He answered and they cheered. He climbed onto the stage and with arms stretched outwards, he opened his mouth and a powerful singing voice came out.

_"In a time of need only few can see what's wrong_

_Millions tend to crawl but only those who choose can make it through it all,_

_Only few can sing like lions 'cause we sing until we're gone_

_And we've got each others backs until we're back where we belong." _

He finished singing and they cheered for him, clapped for him, pushed him to be in the light that he was always depraved of. He was happy for the first time in what seemed nonexistent.

He didn't want it to change.

But it did.

* * *

_we did this to him. it's our fault. all of it._

* * *

A fist bump was not returned.

A face could no longer be seen.

The light was overcoming the shadow.

And the light was leaving the shadow behind.

_"The only one who can beat me is me."_

Everything took a turn downwards and didn't seem to stop. Not when there was a rosebush full of thorns that could piece your heart, or when someone had laid out a bed full of hot, steaming needles that just waited to kill. It was all ignored as the road grew steeper and steeper, away from the light and more into oblivion.

Everyone grew, except for the small boy who wanted to be with them always. He was not useful to them anymore. He couldn't be useful, not when everyone started to refuse to go to practice. Not when his own partner, his light, his savior, decided that it was just a bore.

What happened to what they had?

Their friendship, their bond?

Their love?

* * *

_I'm sorry. i'm so so sorry. i didn't mean to. i never meant to._

* * *

_"I… don't even remember how to receive your passes anymore."_

And with those exact words, the realization hit him.

He would never be able to get him, or any of them, back.

They left him behind.

No.

They just took what was rightfully theirs.

They just took away the light that they had given him.

To be honest, it was fair, wasn't it?

_Wasn't it?_

* * *

_why? why did you think we couldn't figure this out together? why did you give up so easily?_

_why did I leave you behind?_

* * *

On graduation day, when they had won their third consecutive wins and they were retired from the club, they all got a message from someone whom they had not heard for some time now.

They all looked at the message, and whether they had a face of confusion or a face of laziness, it didn't matter. Because, in the end, they were all nagged with the feeling of curiosity.

_'Please meet me at the gym.'_ Was all that the message said. No explanation whatsoever. Anyone would have gotten curious, especially for an emperor who could not analyze what the message might have contained.

So, before the ceremony began, the now retired members all met at the same time, at the same place, and with only one look, they all knew that they all got the same text message.

In sync, they moved towards the now empty gym, void of basketballs bouncing, sneakers squeaking, and voices laughing, but then again, the last sound was lost long ago.

The emperor opened the door and saw that no one was inside. Those behind him looked skeptical and were about to leave the scene when the emperor stopped them, pointing to the stage.

A red, blinking light shone weakly and they moved forward to encounter where such light was coming from.

And when they finally found the source, they looked at the object incredulously.

A voice recorder, with one message inside.

Carelessly, the emperor clicked play, ready to get this meaningless event out of the way.

* * *

_"Everyone, this is the last. Please enjoy."_

~.~

_In a time of need only few can see what's wrong_

_Millions tend to crawl but only those who choose can make it through it all,_

_Only few can sing like lions 'cause we sing until we're gone_

_And we've got each other's backs until we're back where we belong_

_A women held my shield and through the battle we did wrong,_

_A man who taught me wisdom through the static we recall,_

_And maybe when we're gone out names will echo through the stars,_

_Every start's got it's ending even when we've learned to rise above it all._

~.~

_These lies are leading me astray, it's too much for me to stay._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

_I see you so please stay strong,_

_I'll sing you one last song and then I'm gone._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

~.~

_And we once also had a story too_

_You can see that good men only come in few._

_Even in our greatest moments we may win or we may lose,_

_Every song's got its rules, you've got to learn to make it through._

_Maybe one day we can choose how it feels to be a woman or a man_

_ Without rules but buried underneath there's a picture glued._

_So when my body burns in ashes only sing the truth_

_Let these words strengthen all your views_

_Because these words were meant for you._

~.~

_These lies are leading me astray, it's too much for me to stay._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

_I see you so please stay strong,_

_I'll sing you one last song and then I'm gone._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

~.~

_And now I'm floating right above my coffin as it closes I look down._

_I see a sigh as she's crying on my moma's shoulder._

_I look up into the sky as the gates to heaven open something's wrong._

_Is this destiny or am I going home,_

_What will happen to my soul will I come back I don't know,_

_Will you meet me when it's over let me know,_

_You can meet me here in heaven don't you ever let me go._

_This love, this hate is burning me away._

~.~

_These lies are leading me astray, it's too much for me to stay._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

_I see you so please stay strong,_

_I'll sing you one last song and then I'm gone._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

_~.~_

_These lies are leading me astray, it's too much for me to stay._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

_I see you so please stay strong,_

_I'll sing you one last song and then I'm gone._

_I don't wanna live this destiny; it goes on endlessly._

_~.~_

_This love, this hate is burning me away._

_~.~_

_This love, this hate is burning me away._

_~.~_

_._

_._

_._

_"I'm sorry."_

* * *

And just as he said those last two words, and those listening had tears coming out of their eyes unconsciously, they all heard it.

A bang that came from the roof.

And the first one to fall to the ground was the very partner, the very light, who had been side by side with the boy who had just sung heartbreakingly, yet beautifully.

"Tetsu…" He whispered as he covered his face, understanding the occurrence that just happened. His legs couldn't move at all. He couldn't even check if he was ok.

He was abandoning him.

Again.

And one by one, they all fell to their knees, and even the emperor admitted quietly to himself that he had made a mistake, a horrible mistake.

A siren could be heard in the distance.

* * *

in a time of need only few can see what's wrong

_i was blind. what did you do to deserve this?_

millions tend to crawl but only those who choose can make it through it all,

_you were so close to making it. where are you crawling towards now? to the coffin that is closing? to heaven that doesn't want to see you die?_

only few can sing like lions 'cause we sing until we're gone

_we left you._

and we've got each other's backs until we're back where we belong

_we've got each other's backs? it reminds you of us? don't make me choke on lies. we betrayed you in the end. and we're sorry._

_please come back._

_please._

this love, this hate is burning me away.

* * *

**So, how was it? Leave a review telling me how it was like :)**

**As mentioned before, this isn't as angsty as my other ones but I still think it's pretty depressing. I found a new respect for Kuroko now. He's been through so much in the past but instead of giving up, like most people would have done, his strong will and determination made him get his friends back. And I found that so amazing about him :)**

**This song is beautiful in my eyes and I really hope you guys feel the same way :)**

**Remember the story I was helping my friend with? It's another Parasyte: The Maxim story and this time, there is no angst whatsoever and she told me this could be comedy, which is crazy since I don't really write such genres. I know a lot of you won't read this one because you're not in the fandom, but I do think you can still enjoy it either way.**

**In short, the story is about a parasite trying to give tips to a human boy on how to have sex with a human girl. I don't know how it happened or why I wrote it like that, but trust me, you won't regret reading it (lol)**

**Anyways, that's it for me and please tell me how it was :)**

**Peace,**

**FlyAndDontLookBack**


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